Idaho or BUST!

"Life is a journey, not a destination.." - Ralph Waldo Emerson

We left at dawn, the motorhome filled with my every possession and my sister following in my car behind.
Exactly 111 miles later, in the middle of a heat wave, we busted. The temperature gauge hit high, and smoked piled out of grill... we were officially broken down on the side of the 5 freeway in Bakersfield. We quickly threw the animals in the car and sent my sister to an air conditioned hotel... my mom and I waiting in the growing heat with cars speeding by and trucks shaking us on the edge. We kept jokes, and sarcasm as our morale generator. As our tow man pulled up, we were grateful to get out of the way of danger and relief from the intense heat.

Because it was a Sunday before a Holiday, the many calls made to get what we needed fixed all were dead ends for the foreseeable next two days.
When we realized we weren't going to be able to drive anywhere, we decided to make the most of it... "vacation in bakersfield during a heat wave" was the only mentality where we didn't all get angry or start crying out of pure frustration.

And then it happened, one of those beautiful moments where everything becomes an opportunity and there is light. Sean, the man towing us offered to fix the cooling system, in the parking lot of our hotel in the coming days.... salvation!

The next morning I woke up to find that I had been robbed. An old steamer trunk, filled with clothes, memories, every coat I own and my bicycle under a tarp had been jacked. It hit hard at first, more the idea of being invaded and that some people choose to do things like this. After a few moments of doing a mental itinerary and shedding a tear for those old vintage leather goods.... I couldn't allow myself to be too upset, things come and go.

Bakersfield was kicking my butt, stealing my things and ultimately giving me a feeling that the Universe wanted me to slow down, assess the situation, grow from the mounting "obstacles" or at least, find the lessons in the moments at hand. I consciously kept checking in with my state of being... everyone is alive, and we are on an adventure. Go with it, no resistance. 

The Universe then responded with my best friend, who was passing through Bakersfield later that day, and whom I hadn't had a proper goodbye. His similar hobo lifestyle allowed for him to take a few days, not even go home to LA to unpack after Burning Man - and drive with me to Idaho. Things were starting to look better.

Later that day, I got a lesson in rebuilding the cooling system for an old Chevy chassis. Sean, my trusty tow man who had a love of classic cars, and chevy engines, was an extraordinary person to come into my life at that exact moment in time. We spent 10 hours redoing a complete cooling system, and I eagerly paid attention to every moment. If I was going to commit to owning this motorhome, I was going to learn everything I can on how to fix it.

                  

             
         



After two nights of our original departure date, oil covered hands, lack of sleep, one more passenger, and a lighter load....... we headed North.The motorhome sounded strong, and stayed perfectly cool as we made it through Nevada and up towards Oregon.

Open plains surrounded by green mountains, the setting Sun, pinks, oranges and weather clouds.
It was surreal silence filled with untouched perfect nature... and a long road ahead.

SNAP, the fan belt.

At first, it wasn't so bad. Knowing what I now know about cooling systems I laid on the Oregon Highway under my rig and removed the rest of the belt, and also noticed my radiator hose snapped from the pressure releasing all of the fluids.

As we waited for the new belt and fluids to arrive, we opened the back blinds, allowed for the perfect orange and pink sun to fill the RV, and had some wine. This is called, "making the most of it." It was a peaceful moment I will remember forever... especially because not more then one moment after I gave gratitude in recognizing such peace the wind picked up, and clouds turned grey... the wind was so strong, you couldn't stand outside without holding on to something. The motorhome was parked on the edge of a 6 foot grade down to the meadows that surrounded.

Right then there was a real, flash fear of something incredibly bad happening and my dog and cat rolling in a fiberglass box. As I try to brace a 7000 pound motorhome on a tiny ledge in the middle of nowhere... Kelley, the mechanic showed and laughed as he approached .. "Honey if that thing is going to flip, you aren't going to stop it".
I surrendered. I had a quick talk with the Universe and said " Whatever happens ...happens, bless us and keep us safe!'' I moved inside and watched the wind and rain blow through the Valley in which we were parked. A few moments later, the winds died down, the belt was secured, our fluids were filled and we were off.

Four undisturbed hours of driving through lush farmland later... and we pulled into my new town.

Of the many things I had experienced on the move, I am proud of and grateful for all of it. We can't change things as they happen, but we can change our perspective to not allow the circumstances of our lives to control the state of being of our lives. 
I experienced the loss of material wealth, the gaining of knowledge in many aspects, the opportunity to use patience, and positivity... and most importantly, the signs of life - in the people and the little moments that are put there for you to make it through. Big shot of love and gratitude for my family, Andre, Sean the tow man, Kelley the mechanic and my motorhome, Norma Jean.


Idaho or bust?!?! No, Idaho after bust... but I got there :)

Go Love Yourself

Were going to start with the most important element to life, happiness and longevity –LOVE.

Love has turned into an emotional gift you give others, something you may often find yourself questioning because it doesn’t feel like what we have heard “love” to be. There are expectations attached to the word Love, but the moment we realize self love is the key to dropping any unwanted life stress – true love becomes an integral part of your everyday life.

We can’t truly love anyone or anything else, until we are fully committed to loving ourselves. You are the most important being in your life, you have the ability to create the reality you desire and enjoy the beautiful moments we are here to experience. It is up to you to choose your bad days, or label them as such just the same as it is your choice to not let things affect your happiness.  Knowing in those hard moments that everything is ultimately OK and that this too shall pass, is what loving and trusting yourself means.

You are a perfect, beautiful and special being and the justification for those words comes from your existence on this planet. Believe it or not, we were not created to grow up, do bad things, make bad decisions, have pain, get a boring job, have kids, an unhappy marriage and retire. We are here to have the human experience; we were all given the most intelligent immune system, minds, bodies and souls to thrive in all capacities. Our natural state of being is to be connected to the earth, and everything and everyone on it. The golden rules apply to become the best version of ourselves and flourish as individuals.

Allow yourself to appreciate every aspect of YOU – get in touch with the inner child, and your heart chakra. Know that you are always protected and always supported in any dreams and goals one has. Start appreciating yourself.  Being in tune with your heart will allow for the most amazing journeys as you allow yourself to drop negative thinking patterns. Start taking responsibility for everything that happens inward and outwards and you will eliminate fears and judgment of yourself and others.

Try loving yourself a little more today. Give yourself some credit in the moments you feel lacking, do the things that excite you and be aware of your excitement ~ smile in the mirror and laugh with your dearest friends. When a circumstance arises that you don’t prefer, say what you would prefer from that moment, learn from yourself and choose a lighter approach to your already perfect state of being.

You are the keys to your kingdom and love is all there is.

original article by Jacq Crawford - www.calicogirl.com/go-love-yourself